In his book, “How I Found Freedom In An Unfree World“, Harry Browne writes that there is a price to be paid for every choice we make and every action we take. He wrote that even when making carefully considered, deliberate, intentional choices that maximize our happiness, we pay a price.
That price may be the loss of other choices we could have made. It may be an investment of time, energy or money. It may be a painful loss of a marriage, a friendship or a job.
When we pretend we have no choice by giving that power over to another person, institution, “rule”, social norm, etc. we still pay a price. It’s an even higher price because the choice they make is never the best choice for us.
This speaks directly to my heart.
I learned many years ago that I had limited capacity to accomplish work and get ehat I wanted. My 3 Big Rocks and 1 Big Rock action plans were a direct result of learning how to prioritize what was most important to me because I would never have enough time to get to the rest.
The Big Rocks made me effective at work and in my personal life.
As I reflect on where I am today, I think about the choices I made and prices I paid.
- I committed to my wife when I was 21. I received love, passion, loyalty and commitment for 29 years. The price I paid included: giving up young adulthood, career options, significant financial costs, other women. It was worth it.
- I was in my mid 30s when I finally accepted that I would be a career salesman. I stopped going to night school in the hopes that I could someday graduate and work in another field. Over time, I was rewarded with money, learning opportunities, excitement, prestige and eventually early retirement. Go figure. I never expected to be in sales. The price I paid included the loss of a more fulfilling career, the stress of a a sales career, the travel etc.
- We moved a lot – for family reasons and for work. Moving gave us the opportunity to spend more time with my wife’s adult kids. It enabled me to advance into different jobs. We got away from bleak, long winters and spent years enjoying Florida and later Raleigh. The price we paid – lack of community ties, isolation and distance from old friends, real estate and moving costs, a lack of roots.
I could go on for hours about my different choices and the prices I paid.
I won’t.
Today, when I make choices, I usually think about what I am giving up too. It helps me to accept my decisions and have fewer regrets about what might have been.