I was introduced to AITA this year when browsing reddit and listening to podcasts. It stands for “Am I The @sshole?” and precedes someone’s rant about a situation where they had a conflict with another person. AITAs are quite popular online and in user submissions to podcasts.
They follow a standard format. The writer explains how they did something and how the other person (the perpetrator) responded. Naturally, the writer is always portrayed as having acted in a perfectly reasonable, rational manner. The perpetrator, is cast in the most negative, hyperbolic light as a person who clearly interpreted the situation incorrectly.
Then the writer asks, “Am I The @sshole?”
I have your answer. Yes.
You are because you wrote this AITA. Now grow the f*** up and be a man (or woman). Quit fishing for sympathy by casting your “adversary” as a malevolent moron.
You don’t need sympathy. You don’t need to get validation for your feelings. You don’t need to express your authentic self.
Sometimes things don’t go the way we want. Sometimes, it’s our fault. Sometimes it’s another person’s fault. Sometimes, it’s chance. Sometimes, it’s miscommunication.
Suck it up.
Address the issue directly with the person you offended. Apologize if it is owed. Have a conversation to clear up any miscommunication and get things on track.
I often say, you won’t find your answer on the Internet.
This time, is the exception.
You are the @sshole.
So fix it.
.