Author: Steve Ainslie

The time between phone calls to my mother and long time, long distance friends has continued to grow. During times of crises (both mine and theirs), we spoke more frequently. Fortunately, all of those crises have passed. Now we don’t have much to talk about. We have all settled into our comfortable routines and lives….

A book I’m currently reading (We Should Hang Out Sometime) references the UCLA Loneliness Quiz. The author, a 40 year old man with a wife and two kids, is disappointed that his results rank him as more lonely than average. So of course, I was curious to see how I would fare. Given that I…

For the 29 years I was with my wife, I willing chose crappier options for myself in order to give her better options. I did this intentionally because I loved her. I was younger, stronger and a man. From my perspective, this wasn’t a choice, it was simply what a good man does. I am…

It is fall in Raleigh so the streets are filled with piles of leaves awaiting pickup from the city’s leaf collection trucks. I’m fortunate to live in a neighborhood whose streets are lined with maple trees, cherry trees and crepe myrtles so there are huge piles everywhere. Sparkles has an absolute blast when she encounters…

Every commercial I hear (mostly on podcasts) wraps with “Contact us now to receive your <discount> <bonus> <special offer> which is available for a limited time only.“ I remember TV Commercials from back in the day would end with the announcer saying “Act now…supplies are limited…offer valid for the first 100 callers only…” Does any…

I think about my deceased wife every day – when I’m working out, when I’m swimming laps, when I pass a flower garden, when I’m happy and when I’m sad. When I am feeling mushy about how cute my dogs are, I think, “She would have loved you.” When I read a restaurant review, I…

Every once in a while I still catch myself doing something that makes absolutely no sense. Today’s epiphany was that I have two separate stacks of microfiber cleaning cloths. I have my “good” stack and my “old” stack. I use these cloths for everything – dusting, cleaning the kitchen, wiping up in the bathroom, as…

Two people whom I know recently had to euthanized their beloved pet due to illness. I “know” each of these people only causally. One is a neighbor and the other is someone I “know” online only from the Solo forum. We’re not close, but we’re close enough that we occasionally share things that go beyond…

Scott Galloway was discussing the Hamas terrorist attacks on Israel and his own Jewish ancestry when he explained being an atheist by saying, “I choose not to believe that there is an invisible man in the sky who controls everything.” It made me laugh. Obviously, he said it this way for dramatic effect. But as…

When I moved to Raleigh after my disastrous road trip I was still mired in grief for my wife, who had died 6 months earlier. One of the first people I met was Carol, who worked the self-service checkout counters at the grocery store. As I checked out each week, we’d chitchat about the weather,…