By my estimation, I’ve picked up 14,000 piles of dog shit during 10,000 dog walks over the past 25 years. I am an expert in dog shit. I know when my dogs are feeling great. I know if my dog ate some dead thing in the back yard. I know if my dog is sick….
Author: Steve Ainslie
Ponzi Schemes, Crypto and NFTs
“There’s a sucker born every minute” P.T. Barnum The collapse of the crypto company FTX and its founder, Sam Bankman-Freid’s Ponzi scheme has dominated the news lately. Apparently he conned seasoned investment bankers and VCs out of billions of dollars while bilking individual crypto investors of billions more. I am not the least bit surprised….
There’s No Team In I
Doing what I want, and not being made to do things I don’t want to do, has been one of my main priorities in adulthood, the principle around which I’ve structured my life. I would define power as the ability to make other people do what you want; freedom is the ability to do what you want. Tim Kreider, “Power? No thanks, I’m good.”, NY…
Looney Tunes
I am taking a “Cartooning 101” class with the goal of adding single pane comics to my essays. Since everything I write is about me, I need to develop a self portrait/caricature/character for myself. That’s been a riot. Not. Drawing self portraits has been a challenge. So far, none of my images look like me…
I Will Probably Disappoint You
This month, I was invited to be a guest on the Solo podcast! The host said that I had an “interesting story tell and have a thoughtful approach to life”. The more I think about my story and answers to some of the questions I anticipate, the more I think, “Yeah. Maybe.” I’m not ambivalent…
Uncle Russ
My Uncle Russ lived in the apartment above Aunt Es. Russ lived alone. His wife died from a heart attack before I was born. He worked for the railroad until he retired. Every night, when dinner was ready, I’d run down Essie’s hallway and bang on the radiator pipe with a spoon to let him…
Empty Tank
Today is exactly four years since my wife died. This year feels different than previous years. I’m not immeasurably sad. I no longer think of myself as part of a couple. Even so, I think of death everyday. I often think about my wife and this time of the year brings back some of the…
Subsidized Life
I have been surprised lately by the high number of artistic people I know who present themselves as self-supporting working artists who made it through hard work, sacrifice and determination. The surprise comes when I learn that they built a successful career while having their expenses covered by their parents, inheritances and trust funds. I’m…
Goodbye Father Stranger
My father died last night. After he and my mother divorced when I was around 5, he moved far away and he had little to do with us. He remarried quickly and had another child a few years later. I remember getting birthday cards each year, an occasional letter and speaking on the phone a…
We’re Not Here
Last night I had a dream where my wife and I were going to a fast food joint. We were walking at first but for the last mile, I flew her there using my jetpack – which, at the time, seemed totally reasonable. While we were in line placing our orders, our little old man…