I was thinking about my first house I bought in Raleigh back in 2012. It was perfect. It was on a cut-de-sac just 2 blocks from a park with a lake. We put in hardwood floors, new windows, removed the popcorn ceilings, updated the appliances, painted the entire interior and replaced the AC and hot water tank.
In 2016, we sold it and moved back to Florida. It was my idea.
I was an idiot.
I loved that house and living in Raleigh. My wife did too.
But I knew how much she missed seeing her son. He visited us once or twice a year. I offered to fly my wife to see him, but she hesitated to make the trip without me and I was always working. I had to hoard my PTO so it was available to use when my wife was ill, had medical procedures or was injured. Unfortunately, this was several times a year, so I rarely had more than a few vacation days that I could actually use for leisure.
Then he told his mother that he was planning to marry his girlfriend and have a baby.
When I heard this, I thought, “He’s going to need his mother’s help. And she’s going to want to be near him when he needs her.” I also thought, “My wife is getting older. We should go now while she’s still active and relatively healthy and can enjoy her time with her son.“
Since I was working remotely, now was the time to do it.
Plus, we had lived in Florida for years. We both liked Florida too – especially in the winter.
We sold our home and moved. I did it for her and never complained.
The home we bought in Florida and the neighborhood we moved to was not as nice as Raleigh. But it was OK. We did our best to make it ours.
Her son ended up not marrying his girlfriend or having a baby. Still, since we were about 30 minutes away from him, he visited often for dinner. His visits made my wife light up with joy.
Within a year, she was diagnosed with lung cancer. During the next 8 awful months, I thought many times how glad I was that we had moved back to Florida. My wife had one good year with her son and then, when she fighting cancer, they saw each other often too. Had we stayed in Raleigh, that closeness would never have happened.
Still, I occasionally feel a pang of regret about selling my old house. It was the nicest place we ever lived.
I looked it up the other day and saw it has sold 3 times since we left, most recently in 2022 for nearly double what we paid for it just 10 years earlier.
I couldn’t afford to buy it now, even if I wanted to. I don’t want to buy it – but I miss its new windows, massive 2 car shed and the memories we made there.
Part of me wishes we never sold it.
I can’t change the past. I’d like to say I have no regrets, but sometimes I do.
My head was a little spun up with “what ifs and I wish I had knowns…”
I knew exactly what I need to do.
I cleaned my house from top to bottom. I started on a ladder with the kitchen cabinets, overhead light fixtures and ceiling fans. Then I worked my way down to eye level cleaning the doors, counters, cabinets and furniture. Then I crawled around the floor to clean the baseboards. Then finally, I vacuumed and mopped the entire house.
By the time I was done, I was in love with my home again.