I am listening to an audiobook, “The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning”.
The author writes about a Swedish method of decluttering called döstädning (death cleaning). This is a process of clearing out unnecessary belongings that can be occur at any age or life stage. The author says it should be done now, while you are alive and capable, to spare others from having to do it for you.
I enjoyed listening to the author talk about her experiences of death cleaning after her in laws, her parents and her husband which lead to her doing her own death cleaning while she is still alive. She talked about what to do with photos, keepsakes, artwork and paperwork. She talked about grief, children and heirs. She talked about love, memories and joy.
She nailed it with this book.
I’ve been doing death cleaning since the night my wife died.
It started with going through her clothes and sorting them into 4 groups:
- Donate to charity
- Save for Fashion Show
- Keep for memories
- Trash.
I spent days sorting, boxing and organizing her clothes. Once packed in bins, her clothing filled three closets floor to ceiling.
Two months later, I donated all of it to charity except for a handful of items I gave to friends and one item Ellen wore when we first started dating.
After clothing came household goods.
We had 5 brooms. 2 vacuum cleaners. 50 towels. 12 sets of sheets. We had trash cans in every room of the house and extras in the garage. We had flower pots, plant stands, and hoses in every corner of the yard with spares stored in the garage.
In the kitchen, we had 2 complete sets of dishes for 12, silverware for 20 plus the “good stuff” which was an entire other set of silverware and fine china that we last used in 2006.
To feed one dog and two cats we had at least 15 bowls.
Zack took the fine china. My neighbor will take the rest for a foster home charity he said can use it.
Then came my tools.
I had three complete sets of screwdrivers plus plenty of miscellaneous random ones. Two hammers. Two drills. Eight hand saws that I never used. 12 extension cords. 3 organizers full of screws, nails, and bolts plus another dozen plastic packages of the same.
A wheel grinder (used once). A circular sander, used twice. A chain saw, never used. A generator, never used.
A full set of painting tools and products – most untouched in years.
My tools were well organized. I could find everything easily and my garage was neat. So I did not think I had too many until I really looked at them this week.
Then I did the photos.
I started with an entire cabinet stuffed with 13 stuffed manilla envelopes. By the end of the night I had reduced it to 4 small piles: for her sister, for her brother, for Zack and for me.
Zack got the most. He loves photos, after all he is a photographer.
I kept have an envelope full for myself. I also saved a bunch digitally.
Her sister and brother each got a small box of photos that I guessed they might like.
The furniture was easy.
Zack is taking anything he likes – I already scheduled movers to take it to him in a few weeks.
I didn’t even bother trying to sell the rest. A quick search on Craigslist uncovered many antique items that were in much better condition being sold for a few hundred dollars. It’s not worth the aggravation of no shows, lowball offers and sifting through the scams for that.
I’ve walked three neighbors through my house offering them their pick of my belongings for free.
As of today, everything has been taken except for the china cabinet. It’s beautiful but nobody has room for it so I’ll be calling the Salvation Army to pick it up later this week.
The more I get rid of, the easier it gets.
I should have done some of this when my wife was alive – long before she had cancer. We had too much stuff.
I will never have this much stuff again. Even with my house now 75% empty, I have much more than I need.
By the end of the week, I’ll have the house 85% empty and will start “camping” in my home so I can test my gear.
In three weeks, everything I own will be stored in a 4’x6′ pickup truck. The truck will be my transportation, my garage and my closet.
My camper, which is 6’x8′ will hold my bed, my cooking supplies, my fridge and my solar batteries.
When I die, nobody will need to do death cleaning for me. I’ve already done it and will likely shed more stuff once I spend some time on the road.