Every night, at dinner, I wind down. Back when my wife was alive, I loved winding down around dinner time. We’d take a leisurely evening stroll with the dog, holding hands, talking, enjoying nature and each other’s company. Then we’d then pickup takeout or cook. We’d feed the pets and then all of us would sit in the living room watching Netflix, chatting, eating and snuggling together into the night.
We had years where dinner wasn’t so peaceful. Back when the kids were little there was homework, baseball games, sleepovers, after school pickups, chores, laundry, cooking, cleaning and lots of racing around. But those days were many years ago. For almost 2 decades, it was just us. Other than dining out and date nights, we spent most evenings at home.
Now that she’s gone, my dinners are alone. I haven’t owned a TV in years. But I still like to put my mind on pause during dinner, so I’ll stream something on my iPad while eating. Occasionally I find a series that’s interesting enough to capture my attention for a few days or weeks.
But, more or than not, I don’t enjoy watching anything.
I’ve tried Netflix, Amazon, Peacock and “free TV”. Here’s what I think the problem is – I don’t get engrossed by anything. As soon as a trite plot line is redeployed, a stereotypical character is introduced, or gratuitous sex/violence shows up, I tune out. Literally. I’ll fast forward through it.
Then there are the commercials. So many commercials. I know all the ways to block them and skip them – but many are unavoidable. If you think I’m uninspired with the content of TV shows, imagine how I feel about the latest metastatic breast cancer drug, insurance or car commercial.
Altogether, it ads up to unwatchable.
So I might try only reading and writing after dinner. I’m not sure yet. I tend to “turn off my brain” after a full day of intense exercise, drawing, thinking, writing, drumming and dog loving.
I’m not sure I have the capacity to do anything productive in the evening.
But I suppose, even doing nothing will be better than watching another banal crime drama.