This holiday season I updated my Will and beneficiaries. The last time I did this was in 2020 at the beginning of the Covid pandemic. That was nearly 5 years ago.
Some things haven’t changed much:
- Nobody, other than my dogs, is depending on me.
- My relationships with my mother and sister have returned to a baseline of disconnected and distanced much like they were before my wife died.
- I have no significant “other”, nor much interest in dating, love or any type of romantic relationship.
Other things have changed a lot:
- I have embraced a minimalist, frugal lifestyle which includes owning a minimal amount of stuff.
- Barring unforeseen accidents or diseases, my life is between 2/3 and 4/5 over. At best, I have 15-25 years of living left.
- My relationship with money has changed.
It’s kind of sad not to have my wife to leave everything to. When she was alive, I derived great comfort, purpose and pride from knowing I had set her up to never need to worry about money if I died before her.
She counted on me for most of our married lives and I worked hard to ensure she could count on me forever.
When she died, a big part of me died with her.
So, these past few weeks as I updated my Will, I had things to think through like:
- Who will be my executor?
- Should I leave money to my friend?
- What charities do I want to support?
- What do I want to happen with my pets, my money and my assets if I die this year? In 10 years? In 20 years?
I asked a good friend to be my executor and he agreed. Like me, he’s detail oriented, honest and reliable. I can count on him to make good decisions.
I identified charities I want to bequeath assets to. It’s funny, I worked hard my entire life to provide security and comfort for my wife and me. In the end, I’ll be giving nearly everything away to animal rescue organizations.
It occurs to me that these charities could use the money today vs in the future. I am considering adding periodic donations to my budget going forward. In an ideal scenario, I’d spend or give nearly everything away before I die.
This might not be my last Will. Perhaps in the future I will meet someone to love and care for. Or, I might become involved with different charitable organizations and causes. For now, I am comforted to know my pets will be cared for, my friend/executor will do a good job (and inherit a nice sum), and my estate will help save the lives of many dogs.
I can live (or die) with that.