It is never hard to decide between doing the right thing and the wrong thing.
- Should I stab my landlord in the chest with a steak knife over a dispute or should I negotiate to pay a fee to break my lease?
- Should I take my sick dog to the vet or should I wait a few days to see if she somehow just gets better?
- Should I apologize to my friend because I was an @sshole or should I never mention it because he deserved it?
I don’t even have to think about these things. The right decisions are obvious and easy.
Hard decisions come in three flavors:
- Decisions involving two good options.
- Decisions involving two bad options.
- Decisions where I cannot determine good vs. bad (or right vs. wrong).
None of these are easy. But they all are critical in building self confidence, character and strength.
Here are some of my decisions that involved choosing between two good options.
Do I stay in my current job where I have security, seniority and stability or do I accept a new position that offers more money, advancement and challenges?
Do I keep my truck or do I take a loss to downsize to a car?
Do I relocate for a new job or do I stay put?
Here are some of my decisions that involved choosing between two bad options.
Do we send Zack to military school or give up custody to his father to keep him out of jail and juvenile delinquency?
Do I take my cats on the road to live with me in my camper or do I give them away to new homes?
Do I fight injustice in my workplace or do I keep my mouth shut so I can keep my job?
Here are some of my decisions where I just didn’t know what was right or wrong.
Do I support extensive, painful treatment for my wife’s cancer, or do I encourage her to stop treatment?
Should I give up everything I own to live on the road or should I try to stick it out at home?
Should I get health insurance or should I roll the dice and self-insure?
With this Covid-19 pandemic, we are all facing even more hard decisions.
Our government leaders struggle to balance political, public health and economic considerations.
Our scientific experts try to make predictions based on incomplete data, past history and never before experienced scenarios.
As individuals, we have to filter through the blather from self-serving politicians, pseudo-experts, “news” providers and clickbait articles.
None of us know if we are making the right or wrong decisions in times like this.
I’m a skeptic, although I like to think of myself as a realist. So I tend to view politicians and news providers as self-serving groups looking out for their own best interests.
When they speak in hyperboles and emphasize potential disasters (or miracles), I start looking for the bullshit.
Where is the vested interest? Who’s profiting from this story line? What’s the catch?
It’s always there.
Despite my skepticism, I think most of us are trying to make the best decisions we can with the limited information we have.
When my friends ask for my advice with a hard decision, I often tell them that there is not a right or wrong decision. They should make the best decision they can given what they know at the time.
The decision doesn’t really matter so much. It is more important to make a decision, take action and deal with the consequences.
We will all make some (many?) decisions that turn out poorly. Surprisingly, it won’t matter nearly as much as we anticipate.