Years ago, having lost another job due to an unexpected firing, I learned the only thing I would be receiving from my employer was my final paycheck.
There was no consideration for the long hours, weekends worked, sleepless nights, stress, unpaid overtime or any other extra efforts I had made for the company.
When it came to being an employee, I had realized the only thing I deserved was to be paid for the time I had worked. Other than that, I deserved shit.
It’s been twenty years since that time. I’ve lost some jobs, won some jobs, made money, lost money, had good luck and bad luck.
Through it all I have held onto this mantra,
“You deserve shit.”
Life used to seem unfair.
I was born into a poor family. We moved a lot. I had to take care of myself from a very young age. My student aid was cut. I never caught a “break”. My dog was ill. My wife got seriously sick. Then she got lymphoma. Then she needed 2 back surgeries. Then she got lung cancer and died leaving me alone and lost.
I made big mistakes and paid for them – losing $50K on the house we purchased during the 2008 real estate bubble, losing $14K on the truck I bought to live in after my wife died, losing $20K in a failed attempt to become rich during the dot com boom.
Didn’t I deserve a break?
No. I didn’t.
Life isn’t fair or unfair. It just is.
Sometimes I get what I want. Sometimes I don’t.
When I didn’t, I used to think “I deserve better.”
But I don’t anymore.
Now I just think, “Nope. You deserve shit. And that’s exactly what you got”
Sometimes, when things work out better than I expected, I bask in the feeling that I got lucky this time.
And when things don’t work out well, I say, “Well, this is exactly what you deserved.”
Life never seems unfair to me anymore.
If it does to you, try my philosophy. You might find that accepting that you deserve shit allows you to see the world in a different light.