I began meditating back in 2004.
I would sit each morning in the dark on the sofa with a dog under each arm. I would take long deep breaths and I’d let my mind wander. I followed the advice of some guru to imagine my thoughts as objects floating past me in a stream. I could recognize the thought but then needed to let it go as it floated past on the current.
This type of mediation worked for me for several years.
It helped me clear my mind for the day.
Over time, I drifted away from daily meditation.
A few years later, I began doing Ashtanga Yoga. This practice of slow, deep breathing, challenging postures and intense focus became my meditation.
I would only actively sit to mediate when I was under extreme duress. Often this was when I was waiting for my wife during on of her medical procedures.
Today, 16 years after my first mediation experience, I no longer actively meditate at all.
I tried to resume my morning practice this year for a while. But instead of clearing my head, I found it just made me sleepy at the start of my day.
Instead, I have come to realize that I clear my head and process thoughts through movement.
Walking the dog in the morning is #1. Being outside in nature, focusing on what is directly in front of me, and having few distractions makes it ideal. I do my best thinking here.
Swimming laps is #2. There’s something about the monotony of counting laps and strokes while staring at the unchanging black line on the bottom of the pool while focusing on technique and breathing that is very conducive to meditation.
Exercise and yoga are #3. When I am able to flow through my exercises without thought, I will drop into a mediative state. If an exercise is challenging or a movement is new, I must focus on it. But when I am flowing gracefully, my mind can focus elsewhere.
I have a friend who mediated regularly for years. He was always recommending tapes, books and guided meditations to me.
He would force himself to sit for hours, several days per week while he attempted to meditate.
He bragged to me about how long he would sit on a cushion in lotus position and meditate.
When I tried my failed experiment at mediating earlier this year, he told me that he found meditation was difficult for him to do and he often dreaded it.
I asked, “Then why are you doing it?”
He never gave me a good answer.
I explained how walking and swimming were working for me and that I was not going to continue morning meditation.
A few weeks later, he quit meditating too and started jogging instead.
With podcasts, blogs and innumerable “lifestyle experts” promoting mediation as well as self-improvement, I think we can fall into the trap of trying to become someone we are not.
If you have been forcing yourself to meditate and not having much success, I’d suggest doing a few weeks of daily walks, runs or swimming. You might find the peace of mind you are seeking there.