Last weekend my son did an art event in a penthouse condo that was on the market. My wife and I went to the event to support him.
The artwork was incredible. The artists and their families were an eclectic cast of characters. The condo, not so much. Even if I had the money to afford the condo, I prefer my house.
Here are the Condo details:
- 5 bedroom, 5.5 bathrooms plus staff quarters and an office
- 6600 Sq. Ft
- 27th floor with ocean, intracoastal and golf course views
- Private club includes restaurant, spa, theater, tennis and racquetball courts
- HOA Fee $3,088 / month
- Taxes $47K/year
- Price $2.7 million!
Of course, I was horrified at the costs. But what surprised me was that I couldn’t imagine wanting to live there.
Here’s why:
Valet parking only – Upon arriving, we had to check in with the gate guard. He directed us to the building where we were met by valet parking who we had to tip at least $5. There is no self-parking which means you’ve got to pay and wait for the valet every time you enter or exit.
Lobby – The building’s lobby was as spiffy as any high end Marriott, Hilton or Embassy Suites I’ve visited. In fact, it looked like a hotel lobby, complete with bellhops, a front desk and lots of useless space. I wouldn’t enjoy having to walk through here every time I entered or exited my home.
Elevators – After a 5 minute walk through the lobby, we finally reached the private elevators that whisked us up to the 27th floor. I am grateful that I don’t have to take an elevator to go outside. So are my dog, my wife and my cats.
View – There were two large balconies. You could see the ocean, the beach, the golf course and the tiny people by the pool below. Whenever I am up that high looking down, I imagine what it would be like to jump. As I peered down at the pool 27 stories below, I calculated that if I jumped, my legs would break and my internal organs would rupture. I be worried my dog and cats would fall off the balcony too. Heights really aren’t my thing.
Neighbors – As I looked at the multimillion dollar houses across the intracoastal waterway with vanishing edge pools and million dollar yachts, I thought, “Nobody’s outside enjoying this. The yachts look like they haven’t moved in months. The expansive yards and pools are empty.”
The Inside – As we wandered around the place, I noticed that it was somewhat blah. The walls were white. There marble tile floors were off white. I noticed electric outlets that weren’t square, cracked tiles in the living room, worn brass finish in the master bath, and a surprisingly tiny kitchen. It felt dated and lifeless.
Let’s compare this to Casa Ainslie.
- 3 bedroom, 2 bathrooms plus a 2 Car Garage and a yard
- 1900 Sq Ft. (really too big for 2 of us)
- Ground level with golf course and backyard views
- No HOA (the City’s Zoning Codes are bad enough!)
- Taxes $5.5K/year (and I wish it was lower)
- Price $325K
2 CAR Garage with 2 Car Driveway – Ellen parks in half the garage. I workout in the other half. Parking is free and convenient for up to 6 cars!
Front Door – Opens right into the living room. We’ve got a bay window so the dog and humans can see out.
No Elevators – Just a step down into the garage and the enclosed Florida room.
View – Across the street is a golf course encircled by our neighborhood bike path. I get to watch retirees golf every day while my neighbors walk, bike and jog past them all day long.
Our front and back yard are filled with flowers and plants, thanks to my wife. In addition to our critters, our yard is home to lizards, toads, butterflies, bees, squirrels, birds, and an occasional nighttime possum or raccoon visitor.
Neighbors – My neighborhood is blue and white collar, lower middle class. We’ve got plumbers, cops, construction workers, teachers, mechanics, government employees, nurses and me. It’s the most diverse neighborhood I’ve lived in. My neihbors are white, black & hispanic people from countries all over the world. We have ancient old-timers, middle-aged empty nesters, parents with teens and newlyweds with babies. It’s a good mix.
The Inside – We’ve already painted, put in new floors and windows, replaced the old appliances, and upgraded all the door knobs. Ellen still wants to replace our ocean blue laminate countertops with granite. I know it would look better, but that’s not gonna happen unless I hit the lottery.
What would Ellen and I do with 6600 square feet?
We’d be looking for each other all of the time. She’d be somewhere in the house and I’d be as far as possible away trying to locate her.
Any spare time would be spent cleaning rooms we didn’t use.
But I wouldn’t have to worry to about my spare time because I’d be working nonstop to make enough to pay for the taxes, landscaper, utilities, maintenance and insurance.
No thanks. You can keep the condo.