When I wonder whatever happened to someone I once knew, I’ll google them. Many of the people I grew up with don’t show up in the results.
Sometimes I’ll google myself. Usually my blog site shows up in the first page of results. After that, it’s a bunch of links to other Steve Ainslie’s plus the ubiquitous “Steve Ainslie is on Facebook” link.
But I am not on Facebook. Or LinkedIn. Or Twitter. Or Instagram. Or TikTok. So if people look for me there, it’s as if I do not exist.
Just like the people I search for don’t exist in my google searches.
Does the tree makes a sound...
If you write but nobody reads it?
If the child you raised stops talking to you?
If the love of your life dies and you are now alone?
If you left a job (or career) and are disconnected from what once consumed your life?
If you don’t show up in a google search?
After my wife died, I was dismayed at how quickly our yard transformed from an idyllic garden oasis to an overgrown weedy mess. It was as if it hadn’t been touched in decades when the truth was that she had lovingly spent years taking care of it every day until just a few months earlier.
When I had hernia surgery and couldn’t exercise, I was appalled out how quickly I fell out of shape. Despite a lifelong daily workout habit, within a few weeks I was deconditioned, flabby and weak.
When I left my job where I was a Big Shot Sales Director, I couldn’t believe that no one from the company ever called for my advice, guidance or expertise.
In all three cases, it was as if all the work and effort had been for naught. It’s as if it never happened.
What I’ve come to realize is that everything ends. Within a very small sliver of time, everything that we have done in our lives will cease to exist. Our efforts and accomplishments will fade from memory.
Cities crumble. Empires collapse. Civilizations fade away.
I think about historical figures. From the Pharaohs to the Business Tycoons Barons to the Political Leaders to the Military Geniuses, all that’s left are monuments, endowments, stories and foundations that depict, at most, a minuscule portion of their lives.
So why do anything?
Because the falling tree makes a sound when you are there.
And so, my wife gardened every day that she could. Even when we were moving away and she’d never see that garden again.
I worked out right up until the day before my second hernia surgery. Even though I knew I’d be starting over again one I recovered.
I write, sometimes everyday, sometimes once a month. I know at least one person reads what I write – me.
Millions of people live their lives outside of the limelight of fame, fortune and even google. We make a life by doin what we do every day.
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