I still miss My Little Sunshine Puppy Snickers. It’s been a year since the worst few months of our lives together, when she was suffering from dementia but I had not yet recognized the symptoms. When I am checking for something in my journal from those days, it makes my stomach hurt as I read my notes about her being restless in the night and my being unable to settle her down.
I don’t miss those few difficult months of her life, I miss everything else. I miss seeing her lay in in the sun, completely relaxed. I miss playing frisbee with her when she was a young dog, full of enthusiasm and speed. I miss stoking her soft little face as she dozed off. I miss my road buddy, who accompanied me across the entire country during our 10,000 mile road trip, thousands of miles up and down the east coast as we relocated from FL to NC and then back to FL. I miss having her hop in the car every evening for a ride to the park where me, Snickers and Ellen would stroll around before stopping on the way home to pick up dinner and then all snuggle up on the sofa to watch a movie together.
I know how this goes. I won’t always miss her as much as I do today. I’ve lost a number of beloved pets, close family members, and my wife. Eventually time will make the ache I feel in my chest and stomach subside when I think of her.
It hasn’t happened yet.
I wish she was still here.
