I don’t have many “acquired tastes”.
I think it is because I grew up poor. We didn’t have a color TV or cable for most of my childhood. We didn’t own a computer. Our cars were used. We rented shitty houses and apartments. We didn’t have nice clothes. We almost never ate out.
I learned to be happy with what I had. I celebrated finds from garbage picking. I was thrilled when I had my own bedroom and no longer had to share with my sister. I cherished my one pair of sneakers that I bought for the new school year and my two pairs of jeans.
I lived in lower class neighborhoods, so most of the people around lived the same way. Some had nicer cars – like K Cars or Grand Prix’s. Some had nicer homes that even had a back deck or a basketball hoop in the driveway.
But generally, I didn’t see much wealth or extravagance.
After I met my wife, this all changed. I moved to her neighborhood which was full of upper middle class people. They had lovely homes, landscaped yards and cars like BMWs and Mercedes.
We hung out with her friends and family. All of them were 20 years further along than me. They owned businesses or had successful careers. They dined at fancy restaurants, drove new cars and sent their kids to private school.
And I wanted in.
For the next 20 years I worked my way up the career ladder and the consumption ladder.
The more I made, the more we spent.
- Fancy restaurants several nights a week.
- Mortgages on homes we could barely afford.
- Home improvement loans to pay for custom fences, new windows and ever growing credit card debt.
- “Good” wine and imported vodka.
- Fancy clothes.
- New cars.
Until one day, I heard Dave Ramsey on the radio talking about having no debt and paying off your house early.
I thought this was unimaginable.
My plan was to work until I dropped dead. I expected I’d be in debt forever.
I’ve written about frugality and how we got out of debt before so I won’t rehash it here.
Instead I want to talk about today – 13 years after I first heard Dave Ramsey.
I no longer want much of anything. Big houses, fancy cars, expensive food, gardeners, and luxury don’t interest me much at all.
One way I keep this in check is by not looking.
- I don’t shop at expensive boutiques.
- I don’t test drive fancy cars.
- I don’t live in an upper class neighborhood.
- I shop at Harris Teeter instead of Whole Foods.
- I cook instead of eating out.
I don’t watch home makeover shows that would entice me to replace my Coirian countertops with marble, my cement path with inlaid pavers and my small home with a gorgeous McMansion.
I don’t look at social media where everyone is prettier, wealthier, flashier and cooler than me.
I don’t do online dating, where I could pine for smart attractive women who wouldn’t give me a second glance.
If I don’t see it, I don’t want it.
If you’re struggling to keep up with the Joneses, I suggest giving the approach a shot.