I don’t watch shows or read books that feature torture, horror or extreme violence because they give me nightmares. I’d rather not expose my mind to thoughts of depravity, gore and abuse. It’s not good for my mental well being.
For the past year, I’ve spent my evening hours before bed reading books, then browsing Reddit and watching YouTube videos. I’ve noticed the algorithms feeding me lots of content around food. My stream includes:
- Pizza Reviews
- Pizza Making
- Chef Videos
- Ice Cream Videos
- Candy Making Recipes
- Cheese Videos
- Various Cooking Videos
- Restaurant Reviews
I have also noticed that in the Subreddits I visit regularly (Raleigh, Pittsburgh, GenX) about 1/3 of the posts are about restaurant recommendations, food reviews, “your favorite pizza/tacos/ice cream”, etc.)
I casually watch the videos and read the posts. Sometimes I’ll check out restaurant websites and google reviews to see even more.
The thing is… I don’t go out to restaurants. I don’t eat Pizza, Ice Cream, Italian Food and Candy. I don’t even visit Pittsburgh, much less go to restaurants there.
It’s no wonder I’ve been fantasizing lately about fine Italian dining, pizza, gourmet cheese and ice cream. I fill my head every night with videos, pictures and discussions of delicious foods.
The videos and posts remind of a different time many years ago when dining out was a huge part of my life. My wife and I had date night at least once week during our first 20 years together. It included choosing a place and usually a movie during the week and looking forward to it all week. When date night finally arrived, we’d get dressed up, have a few drinks and then go out for a wonderful night. And it was wonderful almost every time.
During out last 10 years, we transitioned to takeout and blockbuster or Netflix at home. It was comfortable and pleasant in a different way.
After my wife died, I lost interest in food. I still ate – but only at home, alone. I stopped getting takeout altogether.
Then, I tried the carnivore diet and it made my life unbelievably better.
Except – the only things I eat are meat, fish, eggs and liver. There’s no point in going to a restaurant or getting takeout.
On the rarest of occasions when I have a binge meal and eat cheese, chocolate or peanuts I pay a price in terms of stomach issues, headaches, joint pain, disrupted sleep and brain fog for several days. It is never worth it so these “cheat meals” have dropped to just a few times per year. I always regret them.
And so, the other day, I realized that consuming food porn on YouTube and Reddit is making me think about food too much. I’m making myself crazy.
So I stopped. I’ll find something else to fill my head with.