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The Women I’ve Loved

Posted on May 28, 2020August 2, 2022 by Steve Ainslie

Pam was my first love. When I met her in our high school Spanish class, I could tell she liked me. She smiled a lot and never stopped talking to me. Being a sophomore, I remember thinking sarcastically, “Oh great, a freshman has a crush on me!” She was cute with big blue eyes, blond hair…

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How Many People Equals 100,000 Dead?

Posted on May 26, 2020September 4, 2021 by Steve Ainslie

This past weekend, the news reported that the US is closing in on 100,000 people who have died from Covid-19 in the past 3 months.  I’m willing to concede this number is not 100% accurate. News reports claim the number has been understated and overstated for differing credible reasons. Some of these people were likely…

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Opening Back Up

Posted on May 26, 2020September 4, 2021 by Steve Ainslie

Today I visited my surgeon to have my staples removed and a post-op consultation.  Today is also the first business day since my state moved from lockdown to Code Yellow (or Phase II or whatever). What that means is that all stores and restaurants can open, subject to maximum capacity limits, social distancing, facemarks, group…

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When Will There Be A Good Day

Posted on May 24, 2020September 4, 2021 by Steve Ainslie

My wife is dying and there’s nothing I can do about it. I wrote that line in October 2018 and then never completed the post. Today, a year and a half later, I am going to finish this post.

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When Is Enough Enough?

Posted on May 23, 2020November 8, 2025 by Steve Ainslie

I have had it with the clusterfuck of the US healthcare system, the lack of effective social support structures, our profit driven corporation-controlled government and our consumer driven economic system.  For the most part, I don’t even have to deal with most of this. (Except for healthcare since I am an uninsured and live in…

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Why Aren’t We Talking About Euthanasia?

Posted on May 23, 2020September 4, 2021 by Steve Ainslie

When I read the stories about overwhelmed hospitals, people gasping for air,  massive numbers of deaths and bodies piling up in Italy from the Covid-19 pandemic, I expected we’d soon be talking about euthanasia (aka assisted suicide) in the US. At the very least, I expected we’d be discussing giving medications to accelerate dying to…

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You Can’t Run Away

Posted on May 22, 2020October 16, 2025 by Steve Ainslie

A longtime fantasy of mine is to run away.  Disappear. Go. Vanish. Witness protection seemed like a dream come true. Get a fresh start with a home and a job in a new place where nobody knew me.  I’d be unencumbered by the past and have limitless options for the future. After every vacation we…

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The Problems Of Scale

Posted on May 22, 2020September 4, 2021 by Steve Ainslie

The last 10 years of my sales management career were focused on transforming sales team to operate “like a machine”.  We did this by standardizing processes for recruiting, hiring, training, selling, managing and disciplining sales reps and managers. We calculated how many leads we needed to produce how much revenue. We measured phone calls, customer…

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Inguinal Hernia Repair Surgery & Recovery

Posted on May 21, 2020September 4, 2021 by Steve Ainslie

Note: This post is going to detail my inguinal hernia repair surgery and my post-op experience. It is going to be specific, clinical and likely to be of interest only to other athletic men who are considering the surgery. For everyone else, I recommend skipping it.

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I Just Had Inguinal Hernia Surgery And I Am Not A Happy Camper

Posted on May 21, 2020September 4, 2021 by Steve Ainslie

Due to a cancellation, I had my inguinal hernia repair surgery three days ago. I’ll write a separate post detailing the surgical procedure in case other men who have this condition are looking for details. I’ll spare everyone else the details. Suffice it to say, I am on the other side of the surgery. There…

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