Yesterday afternoon I was able to stand for a few minutes without gasping in pain. Today, I was able to get out of bed without having to slide out backwards and crawl on the floor. For the first time in two days I walked around the block with the dogs. I took a shower. I changed the sheets and got dressed.
It feels liberating.
I’m under no illusion that I’m healed. I have constant pain in my lower back running down the back of my left leg. I skipped my middle of the night Advil because I felt fine and then woke at 4AM in pain that required taking Advil and waiting an hour for it to kick in.
This latest injury, which I suspect is a pinched nerve/sciatica has given me a lot of time to think about myself and my life. (As if I needed more time to think about myself).
Changes are coming. I’m 56. In my head, I feel very comfortable as a 60 year old man who has learned from experience, is calm and centered . Physically, I often act like I am 35. I push myself hard and believe I’m in great shape especially compared to to other people my age. I am.
But I’m not 35. And I’m certainly not aging backwards.
It will take me a while to get back normal (non- workout) daily activities. Then I will slowly ramp up to include working out and swimming once again. This time, I am going to make some significant changes that include cutting my workout volumes down a lot. I’m thinking by half, but realistically will probably reduce them by a third.
I don’t need to set any records or keep up with my former younger self.
I want to be able to go through my days injury free. I want to minimize the nagging injuries that come from repetition and overuse. Mobility, flexibility, balance and maneuverability are far more important to me than strength, endurance and looks.
I am not striving to be the fittest man possible. I’d rather just be able to walk my dogs, handle my chores and be fit enough to move fluidly and comfortably throughout the day.
I have had moments in life that I think of as jumping off a cliff:
- When my parents divorced.
- When I switched schools or moved to a different place.
- When I started working out at 17.
- When I started a new job.
- When I got married.
- When I made major changes to my diet, workouts or lifestyle.
- When my wife died.
Some of these I chose deliberately. Others were in response to circumstances beyond my control.
There’s a reason I don’t eat junk food anymore. There’s a reason I don’t sprint or do plyometrics. There’s a reason I quit drinking 20 years ago. There’s a reason I gave up my dream of graduating from college to focus on my sales career.
There’s a reason for me to jump off this latest cliff too.
I’m kind of looking forward to seeing how it unfolds.