I was thinking about trading in my Tacoma for a Honda Fit last week.
I would lose about $13K in the deal.
I was disappointed that I couldn’t get a better trade-in value. I was pissed that we’re in the middle of a pandemic lockdown and likely the beginning of a severe recession so selling the truck privately would be difficult. I was discouraged that my negotiations with the car dealers won me just a measly $500 concession.
Before making a deal, I complained to a friend.
I told him I had made a lot of mistakes after my wife died in 2018. I sold my two cars and bought a Tacoma. I gave away all of our belongings. I gave away my two cats. I bought a tiny trailer and drove cross country to live in the desert. And after two months on the road, I realized that living on the road wasn’t where I belonged and I came home to Raleigh.
I made a bunch of mistakes that cost me a lot of money.
And what I wanted was a break. I wanted to tell the car dealer that my wife had died, that I had made a bunch of mistakes, and that I deserved a break.
My friend said, “You absolutely deserve a break. You just won’t get one from a car dealer.”
He said I should expect a lowball trade-in offer. I should expect that selling privately would be a hassle – or might not even happen due to the pandemic lockdown. He said I should expect to get screwed with the new car price. Then he said what has become my new mantra.
“Prepare for The Universal F***ing.”
The Universal F***ing is nothing personal.
It’s simply how the universe works. It may seem unfair but it is not fair nor unfair. It is random.
Sometimes the good guy wins. Other times, he gets screwed over.
Some people are born on third base. Others are born into abject poverty.
Some suffer from accidents and tragedies. Others have good fortune and lucky chances.
For me, it’s been a mix of good and bad. None of it is what I “deserve”. Very little of it is what I’ve earned.
It just is.
You might think my friend’s words upset me. Instead, they made me burst out in laughter.
His choice of words was brilliant.
My problem wasn’t the loss on the truck/car deal. It wasn’t my regrets for making impulsive decisions in my grief last year.
It was that I wasn’t getting what I wanted right now. I didn’t want to face reality.
As soon as he said it, I realized, “I am going to get screwed on this deal. And so what? That’s the reality of depreciation and car buying. So I can either take the loss now and do the deal. Or I can take a bigger loss and do a deal later.”
Accepting reality and moving on is a beautiful thing.
