While listening to a podcast that I subscribe to, I realized that I hadn’t enjoyed listening to it for quite some time. It occurred to me that I do not like the host. Even worse, I don’t respect him.
The host was raised in an upper middle class family and lived a life of wealth and privilege. As I learned more about his life, I began to understand why he consistently displays a lack of resilience, resourcefulness, character and grit.
He has never needed to.
I’ll admit I’m envious of his upbringing. I wish I had been raised with money, security and wanting for nothing.
But that’s not why I don’t respect him.
I don’t respect him because, as he discusses ad nauseam on his podcast, he never pushes through difficulties to accomplish hard things. Instead, he gives up, whines, or blames it on his parents, his generation or society.
It got me thinking – do I like anyone whom I do not respect? And, conversely, do I respect anyone whom I do not like?
The answer to both questions is yes, although more commonly the two go together for me.
Some people are charismatic, entertaining, funny, silly or naturally gifted. I like them, even if I don’t respect them.
Some people have accomplished great things, surmounted obstacles and difficult circumstances. I can respect them even if I do not like them.
The people I choose to surround myself with, in real life as well as online, are those who combine both likability and respectability.
And so, I’ve unfollowed this particular podcast. It’s no longer entertaining and has never been one that commanded my respect or admiration.
The people I’ve willingly spent the most time with are those I like and respect. Not because of their “official role” but because of who they are.