Many households in my neighborhood are run by children. I see evidence of this everyday. Stay-at-home moms spend long afternoons sitting outside watching their children and/or actively playing with their children.
- This morning I saw a mother lounging by the kiddie pool in her driveway while her children swam. When I walked by with Wiggles nearly six hours later, she was still lifeguarding the pool!
- Another mother spends hours each afternoon making elaborate sidewalk chalk drawings with her kids.
- Dads and Moms accompany their kids of all ages on bike rides around the neighborhood.
- Parents line the sidelines of every baseball game, soccer practice and lacrosse match.
I could add a dozen other examples to this list. What they all share in common is that there are activities that center around what the kids want to do.
When I was a child, I spent a lot of time with my elderly relatives.
My Uncle Bob would take me every Saturday morning to run errands. We’d go to the barber together, then the butcher shop, then see the deli man and the baker. After we wrapped up the morning, we’d return to his house for lunch. if there were chores to be done, I’d pitch in to help with raking the lawn after he mowed, shoveling the sidewalk if it snowed or hanging out the laundry. If there weren’t any chores, I’d run outside to play with the kids on the street.
My Aunt Es was the homemaker. She did the cooking and cleaning. When I spent time with her we did all kinds of fun stuff. She taught me how to cook. I’d help setting the table and doing the dishes. We’d read Grimm’s Fairy Tales together. Then when I was able to read on my own, we’d sit together in her kitchen while I read the comics and Dear Abby and she’d read the local news. Even later, we’d share Grit Magazine and Reader’s Digests. Essie was high energy, so I’d often accompany her for mile long hikes through the woods, into town for shopping and visiting her old lady friends. Essie was a lot of fun. She liked to play cards, Yahtzee, Pinochle and go out to do stuff. I’d join her for miniature golf, sightseeing drive through the country, bingo at the women’s club and anything else. She was a blast.
My grandfather never played with me. Instead, I was his helper for the endless maintenance projects he did. He taught me how to replace rotten tongue and groove boards on the porch. We scraped, sanded and repainted all three porches on the house one summer. We replaced a screen door. We visited the hardware store to buy wood and nails. He taught me how to run a gas lawn mower and hang a porch swing.
Despite all this “adult activity” I had plenty of time on my own to play too. When it came time to play, I was shooed out the door and told to return for lunch, for dinner, or when the street lights came on at night. Then I was on my own to find something to do and someone to do it with. I could always find things to do.
When I was playing, the adults did adults things. They went to work. They talked on the phone. They spent time with other adults. They took care of their homes, cars and families. They socialized with neighbors.
I love my neighborhood. It’s very safe, homey and comfortable. It’s much more ritzy than my small hometown of Tamaqua.
Still, it is ruled by Tyrants – most under the age of 8.
I am so glad that is not how my life is run.