Although I don’t suffer from a fear of conflict and have a long track record of facing problems directly, my preferred choice is to avoid confrontation when possible. Instead of striking out, verbally or physically, if someone doesn’t deserve my attention, I will purposely ignore them. I’m good at this. I’ve been doing it my entire life.
I know my attention is valuable and not to be squandered.
In school, I always had a book with me, so I could read something interesting when the teacher was repetitively droning on and on about something that I had already mastered.
At work, I developed my 3 Big Rocks and 1 Big Rock techniques to focus my time and attention on my most important priorities.
In social settings and online, I avoid braggarts, blowhards, and antagonistic jerks by fading away from them without engaging in debates. It’s a waste of energy trying to change someone’s mind if they aren’t open to it (and most people are not).
I’ve found this to be extremely effective in handling news, social media, online activity and entertainment consumption too. There is too much content vying for my attention that is being pushed at me.
I disable notifications on my phone and all apps, turning them on only temporarily for very specific use cases (like using maps while driving or waiting for a call from the vet).
I ignore 90% of the news headlines I see.
I have automatic filters in my head to disregard anything that begins, “Trump says…”, “Why you should be worried…”, “Democrats…”, “Republicans…”, “Congress…”
Everyone wants attention. We all want to be seen.
It’s important to me that I pay attention to certain people and let them know I see you.
For people who have earned it, I will shower them with attention.
That, to me, is priceless.