When I started teaching myself how to paint last year I knew I was going to suck. I have no “natural” artistic ability. I have no sense for color. I had no technique and no art education.
What I had was a desire to learn and a willingness to fail repeatedly.
I began by following online tutorials. I learned how to layer in skies, mountains and trees. I learned techniques for blending, highlighting, mixing and composing.
After some comical attempts, I was able to paint a landscape that actually looked like a landscape instead of an Edward Scissorhands scene
Over a period of months, I followed different tutorials for abstract painting, landscapes, seascapes and more.
Even if I didn’t like a painting, I kept it on my wall because the thought of starting over was daunting.
Then I began painting without tutorials.
It was a disaster.
My compositions were a mess. My color schemes were distracting. My paintings looked like a kindergartner’s artwork.
Somedays I thought I should just give up. I didn’t. Instead I painted a lot of bad paintings.
Once in a while I’d go back to follow a Bob Ross tutorial simply for fun.
Then suddenly one day, after months of painting, I was staring at one of my “bad” paintings and realized what was “wrong” with it.
Then I started staring at my other paintings that I didn’t like. I began to recognize issues:
- My color choices.
- My failure to use perspective.
- Lack of a focal point.
- Mismatched sizes, shapes or colors.
Now I’ve improved to the point where I can often “fix” a painting. I recognize these problems. I know how to fix them. I think about it. I observe colors and shadows and highlights outside. I then sit down at my easel and “Do over” the painting.
It often turns out fantastic.
Only occasionally do I now paint over the entire canvass and start from scratch.
I was thinking the other day, wouldn’t it be great if we could have a “Do Over” in life?
We could fix the regrets of our past. We could choose better careers, hobbies, habits and partners. We could be better with money, love and friendship.
And then I realized, we do have a “Do Over”.
As long as we are alive, we have the opportunity to try something different. We will likely stumble when we do. We will make a lot of mistakes. We often won’t even understand our mistakes. But if we are willing to learn, to try and to fail, almost everything can have a Do Over.
Right now I am “Doing Over” my life.
For 30 years I was a stepfather, a dedicated husband and a hardworking, ambitious professional.
My career do over happened after I was fired for the last time and started my own business (and failed).
My marriage do over happened after the love of my life died and I had to figure out what I was and how to live without her.
Now I’ve been living alone as a single man for 19 months.
I’ve made some mistakes. But I sure am learning.