My hair growing experiment lasted 2 months. When I began to grow it out I had every intention of letting it get to shoulder length. But after two months, I now realize that I prefer a shaved head. After 3 years of having no hair, my hair grew back a different color. I anticipated more…
Author: Steve Ainslie
Living Light
The first 21 years of my life, I lived a light, minimalistic lifestyle. This wasn’t by choice. It was because I was poor. First, I shared a bedroom with my sister. Then later with various stepbrothers and “boarders”. Eventually, in high school, I had my own bedroom which was fantastic. So I never had much…
Terminal Uniqueness
Sometimes I feel like a complete weirdo because of my past. So at 50, when people my age are about to send their kids off to college, I was widowed and alone trying to figure out who I was and what I was supposed to do with the rest of my life. I’m out of…
Mr. Freezemeister
One woman I dated told me she was “a little intimidated by how much I had my life together”. I laughed and replied that I was still trying to figure out what I wanted to be when I grew up. I was attempting to lighten the mood with some self-deprecating charm and make her feel…
Non-monogamous
Given my lack of sustainable dating success, being non-monogamous should be the least of my concerns. Since my wife died in 2018, I have been as monogamous as one can be. I fully expected that once I began dating I would meet someone and have a committed, monogamous relationship with her. I was wrong. Now…
Searching For Role Models
All my life I had role models who I looked up to at times for inspiration, guidance and direction. My stepfather, my Aunt Ed and Uncle Bob, my mentors, my friends, businessmen, the Lone Ranger, fictional characters, historical figures and others. By learning how they lived, what they valued and how they responded to challenges,…
Pictures and Wedding Rings
I put my wife’s pictures away when I began dating 6 month ago. I had already stopped wearing my wedding ring earlier that year. I removed the ring to keep from alienating any woman who might see me “in real life” and want to give me her number. I put the pictures away because the…
Movie Night
I haven’t been to a movie theater in more than 5 years. When my wife was alive, this was because we had abundant options to watch on Netflix, Amazon, HBO and cable TV. I enjoyed watching TV at home with her and our dogs and cats. Then, after she died and I resettled back in…
Solo-cialisation
I have been searching for community among others like me – single people who live alone by choice. The closest I’ve come is the Solo Podcast hosted by Dr. Peter McGraw and its online Slack community. When I deleted the dating apps this past week, I felt a wave of relief wash over me. It…
Pop!
For the past two weeks I’ve been having pain in my right foot and heel. It felt kind of like the plantar fasciitis that I had back in 2017 that took a year to heal. I suspected there were several causes: In an effort to improve my swimming times, I’ve been pushing hard off the…