I have a friend who’s “had his eye on” a woman he’s attracted to that he crosses path with regularly several times a month. He’s mentioned her to me in the past. They’ve spoken many times as casual acquaintances.
Last week, he told me he’s not sure if the attraction he’s feeling is mutual.
He is thinking of asking her out. He’s been thinking about this for 7 years!
7 years!
I told him there’s a simple way for him to find out – he should ask her out and be specific that this is for a date, not a ‘friend’ thing.
He told me he’s going to.
I wished him luck.
He’ll never do it.
I think that some people, like my friend, prefer to live in the fantasy world of “possibility” vs. facing rejection.
I get it. Asking someone out in person can be awkward. When I do, I blush and my heart races. I never get the words out as smoothly as I have rehearsed in my head.
And what’s worse, is that by asking, I can get rejected. That ends the what-if fantasy quite abruptly.
I hope my friend asks this woman out anyway. The only way to get past fear of rejection is to the a shot. If she says yes, it could be wonderful. If he gets rejected, he’ll learn it’s not the end of the world. The more rejections I’ve gotten – in romance, in life and in sales – the more I realize they aren’t that big of a deal.
My guess is my friend will be talking about this woman until she eventually marries another man who had the guts to ask her out.
I hope I’m wrong.
