Over the past few months, I’ve made a few changes. I started growing my beard and mustache. I updated my wardrobe to include more form fitting clothing. I made an attempt to draw comics. And I’ve been writing essays on a blog with a more direct, and sometimes acerbic, tone.
After making these changes, do you know what I haven’t done – even once? I haven’t asked a single random stranger what they think.
Because I don’t care what random strangers think about me.
I have gotten some compliments and advice on my beard from people at the pool who I see every day. A friend who I shared my comics with compared me to Picasso (sort of). Nobody but me seems to notice or care about my wardrobe changes.
It’s nice that my friends and acquaintances notice changes and make comments. That’s normal.
It would be weird for total strangers to offer their opinions, unless I had done something that resulted in a something extraordinarily noticeable – like growing a handlebar mustache or having my comics published in the local paper.
I haven’t.
Which brings me to the buried lead of this essay.
Online, I still spend time dallying around several forums. I check out City-Data for Raleigh and Pittsburgh news. I waste time on Reddit looking for mind numbing entertaining content like AnimalsBeingBros and KidsAreFuckingStupid. I check out YouTube videos on Animal rescue, bodybuilding, and random news hits.
Occasionally, I’ll check out the comments of other readers/watchers. Sometimes I wonder – “Does anyone else think about this the way I do?“
Reddit commenters are often witty. They’ll comment with puns, cultural references and smart ass sarcasm. City-Data commenters tend to be one of two types – sincerely interested in helping or trolls who try to insult everyone and politicize every thread. YouTube commenters are banal. They lean towards comments like: “you’re so wonderful for doing this” and “more people should be like you.”
Rarely do any of the comments add any value – except on very specific threads around things like local restaurants, weather, or repairmen.
So unless I’m looking for technical, niche, specific info, I don’t read comments.
Since I’m not on social media – I don’t chase comments, likes or views either.
I disabled comments on my blog a few months ago and pay little attention to the volume of traffic I get. I do check it occasionally – my posts about hernia surgery seem to attract the most readers. But that doesn’t affect anything that I write. Those posts are now 1-2 years old and haven’t been updated in a long time. I hope they help others who are worried about their (potential) hernias. But I’m not a specialist so there’s no reason for me to focus on hernias.
My point in this rambling post is that I get no value from random comments from strangers, so this is not part of my life.
I’m aware that many people who use social media (and especially those trying to make money from it), give significant weight and attention to these comments.
My guess is they’d all be a lot happier if they ignored it all.