We like to assign blame for misfortune.
When my wife had lung surgery, radiation and chemo and then died from lung cancer anyway, I was angry at the surgeon for doing unnecessary surgery, the hospital for delaying the procedures by weeks allowing her cancer to spread, and the oncologist for stringing us along for months of ineffective, painful treatments.
When I need surgery to repair my first hernia, I wanted to know “was it something I did?” My surgeon and all reputable online sources said it could be from a weakness since birth, heavy lifting, constipation or physical exertion. In other words – who knows?
When Covid-19 became a full blown pandemic, all of society searched for who to blame for the cause, the lockdowns, the restrictions, the economy, the elections, unemployment and everything else.
I could go on forever with countless examples of accidents, natural disasters, bad luck and illnesses.
I won’t because I’ve learned from life experiences.
I’ve learned that sometimes bad things happen and finding someone to blame doesn’t change it.
I’ve learned that some things are complex. Sometimes you cannot accurately assign a cause and effect.
I’ve learned that many things will always be unknown. We can guess. We can predict. We can argue. We can pontificate. We can assign blame and point fingers.
But that doesn’t make us right.
So I didn’t sue the surgeon or oncologist for malpractice. I still think they were negligent at best and milked my wife for insurance money.
I don’t care whether Covid-19 came from a lab leak, a random animal transference, a biological weapon something else. What could I possibly do with this information even if I was certain it was true?
I now have a second hernia and need another surgery. Should I blame the surgeon for missing this last year? Or myself for exercising too hard? Or maybe it was when I was constipated in the desert a few years ago? Or blame my parents for shitty genes? Nope. I need to have surgery and move on.